Thursday, January 22, 2009

The Before

The pic on my profile is the pic right before I flew to New Orleans. I mean literally Christina and I were in a restaurant in IAH, eating before our flight. Well look how that all turned out. Please don't tell me I'll find someone better or it just wasn't meant to be or he's an idiot because none of it matters now. All i feel is broken, and its been 2 months, so how pathetic am I? Please don't say it takes time because this time it just doesnt feel like it. I know I'll never get an answer but y? Y me? Y do I have to keep dealing with this? What did I ever do to deserve it? I know I know....nothing it's not me, but y do everyday freakin day I wake up and he's the first thing I think about, the person I think about all day, and the person I think about before i go to sleep. Y does it hurt so much and y can't i just be done? Please don't answer because i can't handle anymore "you're better than him" or "he's an idiot" or

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Seriously people

Okay, I know we're all busy and have other things going on but, I'm beginning to feel like I'm the only one on here. Which if y'all dont want to do it thats fine just let me know. The thing is though it seems that fear is holding you back. I realize that weight loss is not an easy thing and u may suck at it, but maybe just maybe if u start writing about those things then you'll be more motivated. Not everyday is gonna be a good day filled with smart choices and excercise. But the whole point behind this was being honest with ourselves and the best way to do that is being honest with ur friends, cause they'll call u out.
I am honestly tired of being fat, it makes me angry and want to scream. I know y'all are too because u always tell me that. Well now is the time friends to do something about it. Even if its in small, miniscule baby steps. Even if u only have the courage to write about doing the laundry at least thats a start. So are ya with me???????

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Wii Fit, Cotton candy and too much spaghetti

I'm sure ur wondering how all of those things are related well there not except that I need to talk about each one. Sunday I bought a Wii fit and I'm super excited about this, not just excited but super excited. Yesterday after the nine hour hike through the biggest park known to man kind and after my nap, I decided to try it out. The first thing u have to do is create ur mii and then u have to take a body fit test. It gives u ur BMI and weight and then tells u about ur posture. Well apparently I'm obese and my wii fit age is 40. Not only does it tell me all this, it makes my character fatter and then points out that there is a difference of 13 years between me and my wii age. However, I started playing it and it's pretty fun, especially when I do really well at something like trying to hit soccer balls with my head, its alot harder than u think. Anyhoo, it can save all ur info so u can track all ur weight loss and stuff.

Next topic, cotton candy. So today, I made it to the gym which is a feat but I did it. I spent 33 minutes on the eliptical working my lil heart out. So everything was going normal when again I smelled cotton candy. It wasn't nearly as strong this time and it didnt last as long but I got a whiff of it. This is becoming a mystery and I like to pride myself in my ability to decipher clues and act like Nancy Drew. Therefore, I am going to solve it even if I have to go to the gym all the time. :)

Last topic, too much spaghetti. I made wheat pasta with spaghetti sauce. It was really good but I ate too much. I should have measured it out but I didnt so now I feel like I'm pregnant with a spaghetti baby. I guess it could be worse though, it could be a real baby. AHHHHH!

Monday, January 19, 2009

That is one BIG park

So today I found myself headed to Memorial Park with Aerin and Hope to get some excercise, sun and fresh air. I had visions of a leisurely stroll through the park complete with laughter and maybe a pretzel from a local vendor. Oh what a wonderous walk it would be. Yeah right! First of all the park is gigantic and we walked around the whole thing. Also it was not a leisurely stroll, aerin and Hope walk fast. Then to top it off my butt started hurting only on one side. There were also no pretzel vendors, alas my illusion was shattered. However, it actually turned out to be alot of fun and definitely good excercise. Eventually my butt stopped hurting and we walked a long way and got some good excercise in and some laughs. It also was a beautiful day outside and I got some much needed sun. I did have to come home and take a nap but I'll get better as we do it more.

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Exciting Healthy stuff I found on the internet

I know I just blogged but I really like blogging and have nothing better to do than talk about myself. Anyhoo, I found some coupons on the internet for yoplait yogurt which I really like to eat. Also I found this thing on the biggest loser web site where u can pledge to lose so many lbs within a certain time frame and they'll donate 1lb. of food to a food bank for every pound u lose. I think thats awesome! I mean I never thought my weight loss could benefit anyone else but me, but look now I get to help those in need as well as myself. Its also gonna make me more motivated because i really want to be able to say that i did my part and lost the weight i said i would so that food banks can get free food. Anwyays here's the links to the yogurt coupons and the biggest loser. yogurt biggest loser pound for pound challenge

Just call me yogi

Friday morning I was able to wake up, take a shower, and get to school at 5:30 a.m. At 6 a.m. we have a yoga class taught by our math lab teacher. This is only the second time we've had it as it is only on Fridays but each time I've been I really liked it. Afterwards I always feel really refreshed and calm, I also have alot of energy which is always good on a Friday, well any day in Kindergarten really. But, the feeling lasts all day, at the end of the day, I was tired but not the usual exhausted man i need a nap way. So I really like taking yoga at 6 am, yes its really early but the way I feel the rest of the day is totally worth it. We also learn how to breathe throughout the day to calm ourselves which is a really good technique especially when dealing with small children or retarded adults. Its also a good workout cause alot of the stuff is kind of hard but as I do it more I'm sure ill get more flexible and who doesnt want to be bendy? Anyways, if u havent tried yoga i totally recommend it cause i really like it.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Well I sort of did better

Today I did not want to go to the gym. However, I overcame that and made myself go. I spent 32 minutes on the eliptical which means I completed the whole weight loss program as well as a 5 minute cool down. Funny thing happened while I was working out. I was right in the middle of my workout when all of the sudden I smelled cotton candy. I looked around but nothing had changed no one had walked by or anything. However, the smell was super intense. I really wanted cotton candy, I almost stuck my tongue out in hopes of gettin some of the sweet deliciousness on my tongue, however, reason prevailed and i kept my tongue in my mouth. I knew that I couldnt be the only fat kid in the room who had noticed the intoxicating smell so I looked around at my fellow gym goers and none seemed phased by this mouth watering scent. Then I thought maybe I'm about to pass out and that's what I'll smell right before I enter unconciousness, kind of like people who have seizures and taste copper in their mouth. But, alas I did not pass out. I'm still not sure where the smell came from but I'm beginning to expect that the gym might be pumping cotton candy into the air vents just to torment me.
On the downside of the day, I have yet to go to my WW meeting. I need a buddy to go with me cause I'm like afraid to go by myself for some reason. I think I'm kind of embarassed since I had done so well and now I'm fat again. Whoa is me!

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Not so good at this

So right now I am supposed to be at the gym working out. Instead I am sitting at home playing on my computer. I should have gone to the gym but I was just not motivated. I had to stay at work until 4:30 because i had student council and the gym is so crowded at 5. These are all lame excuses but nontheless im still sitting here and not at the gym. Well tomorrow is a new day right?

The Dangers of Grama B.'s house

Last night I went to my Grama B's house to give her her Christmas present as well as get mine. She had told me not to eat and I figured we would be going out to eat seeing as how thats what we always do. Well I was wrong. When I got to her house I found that she had cooked enough food for an army and it was only me, her and Ben eating. Not only had she cooked a ton it was Mexican food, needless to say she didnt try to incorporate any WW recipes into it. She made chicken enchiladas, beans, tamales, guacamole salad and chips with queso. I couldnt not eat I mean she made it for me and to be quiet honest I have been a crappy grandaughter lately so I was feelin guilty about that. Okay so next plan of action portion control. Well until she made my plate. So I ate 3 tamales, 1 chicken enchilada, guacamole salad with queso and chips mixed in. It might not be as bad as I'm making it sound but it wasn't exactly what i had been planning. Then for desert, yes theres always desert, chocolate eclairs. I'm not a big fan of chocolate eclairs but then I felt bad because she bought them just for me so heres the guilt thing again. So I have 3/4 of one. I think next time I'll offer to pay for us to go out just to avoid all this. I also skipped going to the gym because I went to her house after work and i thought we were going out to eat so i didnt want to show up stinky from the gym and i wasnt going to go afterwards, because I didnt want to revisit my dinner. So today after Student Council I'm definitely going to the gym and tryin to work off some off that dinner.

Monday, January 12, 2009

I finally did it!

I actually got out of bed this morning and worked out. Then to top it off, I went to the gym after work and worked out some more. Although I did make a discovery at the gym. I accidentally glanced at my side profile and discovered that apparently I also have boobs on my back, how gross is that. Although I think it was this discovery that gave me the drive to spend 26 minutes on the eliptical even when I wanted to give up. But, now I'm really really tired so I think I'm going to go to bed and hopefully in the morning I'll be able to get up and do it all again.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

My Besties

I know this is supposed to be my blog about losing weight but really being healthy is my life so I think there's gonna be some random posts that don't directly discuss my weight loss journey. Now that I say that I'm wondering who I'm tryin to justify this too anyways. lol! Okay but this post is about my two bestest friends in the whole wide entire world. Everyone always used to tell me that u can't have 2 bestfriends, but I think it's just cause they were jealous that they didnt have 2 bestfriends. I feel super duper blessed to have both Carmela and Christina in my life. We have all been through some crazy stuff together but at the end of the day I know that they're always there for me. So to u two crazy ladies, I love you and thank you for always havin my back even when I may not have deserved it. May the triad live long and prosper and get healthier. :)

Thursday, January 8, 2009

The time I skipped Weight Watchers

Okay so I was supposed to go to my WW meeting tonight. This was supposed to be my first meeting back and well obviously i punked out. Instead I'm at home drinking wine and playing Wii. I guess i didnt go because I'm insanely tired, not really sure y just feeling rather sluggish. I've also been in a funk the past couple days. I think part of it has to do with the fact that the holidays are over and i had to return to work. Don't get me wrong I love my kiddos but I'm not such a fan of the getting up early thing. 5:30 comes much quicker than one would think. I think the other part of me skipping was I am afraid of the number on the scale. It's gonna be alot and even though I havent seen it I'm a bit overwhelmed by it. I have to get over this because I will go to WW because I know that program works and I really am tired of being fat. So next Thursday, no excuses.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

My latest discoveries

First of all I would like to document my progress on this crazy weightloss, healthy living adventure. It hasn't been going exactly as planned. Although I will admit I haven't done completely horribly either. Today I actually passed up a delicious piece of cake. At first it wasn't that hard but then my coworker who was sitting next to me decided she needed a second piece and the entire time all I could do was smell the sweet, sweet frosting. I think it might have been calling my name. It took all the strength I had not to reach over and swipe a huge mound of frosting onto my finger and plop it into my mouth. So the healthy eating thus far is going mediocre. The workout part has been just plain dismal. I haven't worked out once, unless u count the 30 minutes of Wii I played slightly drunk from wine. Well i guess excercise is excercise even if you are buzzing.
Now onto my discoveries. 1. I don't know what people do at night. I mean I cooked dinner ate it, called a few people and then was at a loss. I contemplated going to bed but even I think 7 pm is a bit early. So I just watched t.v. all the while trying to create little projects in my mind for myself to pursue. 2. Apparently during my first year teaching I would work out after work, so maybe that should be my new nightly event. 3. I left my fake mustaches in Carmela's mom mobile. I actually discovered this a while ago but I actually told her tonight. I like the idea of fake mustaches because we can have fake cigars and talk like we're living in the 1920's. We can also use the word "speak easy" which is almost as great as the term " day drunk".

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

The Wii said I'm old

So the best thing ever happened on Saturday, I found a Wii at Target and bought it. Needless to say i have been playing the crap out of it since and my upper body is pretty tired. My right arm is so tired that it feels dead. However, when I was playing Wii sports, I discovered there's a section where you can test your skills in tennis, bowling, and baseball. Then the Wii tells you your Wii age based upon your score. I know that I am so not in shape but I'm generally pretty good at sports, especially baseball and tennis so I figured I wouldnt do too bad. I was wrong! Apparently according to the Wii I am 38. That's 11 years older than my actual age. How depressing, but now I'm super determined to prove the Wii wrong and make it tell me I'm 10 years younger than I really am. So I'm gonna practice all the time and then kick the Wii's butt. Yep, thats what I'ma gonna do.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Workout? That means excercise, right?

So no grand get healthy plan can really be lacking an excercise plan. Well, I guess technically it could but I think excercise gives you better results, besides I don't want to have the jiggly fat arm thing going on. At Thanksgiving my Mom felt it necessary to pinch that part of my arm and then it dawned on me it could be hazardous to have all that hangy fat there. Think about it what if I was jumping into an elevator at the last second and my arm fat got caught in the door. Then firemen had to come rescue me and they all of course would be hot and there I would be with my arm fat stuck in a door, not a good way to meet hot firemen. Thus, the arm fat must go along with it's friends, belly blubber, double chin, back fat (the worst), and jiggly butt.
Here's my plan, well at least for this week: I'm gonna start following the 2009 Ultimate Fitness Plan, I found it in Women's Health. This is the link or you can buy the magazine.
The things I like about this workout is that it provides excercise for toning, losing fat, and building muscle. Also most of it can be done at home. It also has you start out with tests so that you can track your progress every four weeks, I think this in addition to the number on the scale will hopefully keep me motivated even when the scale might not be moving.
This week I'm also going to set a goal of playing Wii tennis three times during the week. Say good bye to Jiggly Juli.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Now what do i do?

Okay, so now that I have stated what made me fat, I need a plan to get unfat (I realize thats not a word). So I have several strategies that I am going to attempt to try. The first, having to do with food. I am a big advocate of Weight Watchers, primarily because it works for me and has been the best way I have found to eating healthy. So Thursday night at 7:00pm I am going to return to my WW meetings. This means that I'll be writing down everything I eat, tracking points and trying to meet the five daily guidelines.
One of the guidelines is to drink a minimum of 48 oz. of water a day, this one is hard for me. Mostly because I'm a teacher so I can't just go to the bathroom whenever I want, so its hard to drink alot of water throughout the day because then I'll have to go to the bathroom and you can't really tell a roomful of Kindergarteners to hold on while i take a bathroom break. So my plan is to wake up in the morning and start drinking water while im gettin ready, if I force myself I can get a glass down. Then I need to drink a bottle between 9:45am and 11:15 am. My planning starts at 11:15 so I can go to the bathroom. Then if I steadily drink another bottle between 12 and 3, this will put me up to 40 oz. Then after school I'll drink another bottle which will put me at 56 oz. total for the day, I think this plan is plausible so I'll start with that.
The next guideline that is hard is getting five servings of fruits and vegetables a day. I literally have to force myself to eat them, not because i dont like them but because i tend to rather eat other things. So in the morning, I'll eat a piece of fruit. At lunch, Ill have a salad. Snack time, Ill eat another fruit or vegetable. Then for dinner, Ill have salad with another vegetable.
This is just my starter plan, it might not work exactly but it might. I'll start with this plan and then decide if I need to change it or not.

Friday, January 2, 2009

When I woke up.....I was fat!

As the title of this post would suggest in fact one day i did wake up to discover that i was fat. Now I know the f word is a bad word and people who use it to describe themselves probably don't love themselves and are lookin for a compliment, but this was a reality. I didnt stop loving myself, my self-esteem wasn't shot, and I really wasn't lookin for anyone to tell me the opposite. I'm being honest and I think the most important part of this grand undertaking is about being honest with myself and thus I can admit, I am fat. If you want to dress it up and add a medical twist you could say "obese" but thats longer to type.
Thus, I want this first post to be about how this happened, I want to share my story of how I got fat.
Of course growing up I was always struggling with my weight, all throughout elementary and middle school I was always taller than most kids in my grade and I wouldnt say that I was insanely overweight, I always had a little chub goin on. The other factor is that I come from a family with weight issues. Most of my life I have watched my Dad constantly fluctuate. I wasn't too concerned with all of this in elementary school and assumed that one day i would wake up and i wouldnt be chubby anymore. That didn't exactly happen. We ate pretty healthy growing up and I was pretty active, but as i got older i ate more junk and stopped being so active. This however, isn't the point of this blog because i know my history so for now we'll concentrate on the last two years and how i got fat.
I'm not exactly sure at what moment i started gaining weight but I do remember going that by September 2007 I had gained at least 15lbs. I kept trying to recommit to living healthy and exercising and going to Weight Watcher meetings but i just couldn't get into it. Not to mention, I was now on antidepressants, started grad school and had the class from Hell. So it probably would have been a way better idea to hit the gym and workout my stress but instead i just ate everything and anything i wanted to and ignored the fact that my clothes didn't fit.
I spent most of that year attempting to start again and just failing everytime. When I left for Spain in the summer I was almost embarrassed to go because I knew that everyone was going to notice that I had gotten fat. Of course I went though and had an awesome time and lost some weight thanks, to all the walking up and down the mountain. But, as soon as i got home i fell into the same habits, ordering take out, not working out etc... So once again, I hauled my big butt into Weight watchers determined to start again and succeed. The biggest shock was when I stepped on the scale and it said 220lbs., this is the most i have ever weighed in my entire life, so not good. So the first week i lost 3lbs. and then Hurricane Ike came and i just stopped going to meetings. I think I finally began to realize that there was no point to going if I wasn't really into it.
And that brings us to here, today, right now. Where today I can declare that I, Juli Todd, am 27 years old and fat. But, I don't want to be fat anymore so I'm not going to be. I know its not that simple but really it is, because I have always accomplished my goals and why should this be any different.